Guide to a Successful Marriage

By D Smith


One of the things that has the most affect on a marriage is how a person is raised. While many people can hide this while dating, a marriage can show the side of a person that focuses on being materialistic and self centered. Many marriages tend to decline due to material possessions.

Selfishness tends to show it self early in most marriages as many men and women tend to think of their spouse as one of their personal possessions. Instead of looking at the relationship as a partnership, one party feels that they have the right to control or enslave the other person to do things that are beneficial to them. These people have a hard time grasping the reality that people should not be thought of as a material item.

We want our mates to take a subservient position to our desires. This is the beginning of the end of a healthy marriage or dating relationship. The core of the problems in marriages and dating relationships today is that we rely on traditions and false promises by others and institutions that manipulate our hopes and dreams for profits. We have been led to believe that institutions are held to a higher standard and do not fall into the same category as others who are motivated by selfish desires; but they are! There are in excess of 400,000 marriage counselors, workshops, and therapy sessions posted on the Internet.

The whole state of marriage has become big business as churches, government and big companies have gotten into the act of promoting what is a good marriage. While many of these organizations are trying to do the right thing, it is often a problem that only a couple can work out with one another and a solution is often hard to find.

The problem with many marriages is that some people just get married because they feel its the right time in life or that they need to get married to please their family. The institution of marriage should not be done for any purpose than to find the one person that fits your particular needs and that you can enjoy your life with day in and day out. Any other reason should be a warning to not go along with the marriage as it will often end quickly.

One problem that many people do is try to change the other person or make them act a certain way. While it is good to give in somewhat to your spouse and be objective, a person that tries to change someone will only end up being divorced after a while. One of the number one causes of divorce these days, is individual trying to impose their opinions and beliefs on their spouse after they have not changed to how they like.

It is time for us to face the truth and to adopt a different posture when seeking a dating partner or a marriage companion. We must change our perspective and evaluate why living together in harmony is such a momentous task.




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